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HUMOR HEALS
"Laughter is the Best Medicine"
- submitted by Firstmate -
NEWSLETTER
April 2015
Page 8
REDNECK VASECTOMY
A hillbilly couple, Bubba and Eula Mae, were both bona fide rednecks who lived quietly and happily in the deepest recesses of the holler. A few weeks before their ninth child was due to be born, Eula Mae called the doctor to see about getting Bubba "fixed" right now. The doctor was happy to hear that and gladly started the required procedure as soon as they arrived. He was more than a little curious about what had finally made them decide to do this when they appeared to love having such a large family.
He wondered why it had suddenly become so urgent to get it done immediately, since he had been encouraging Bubba to do it for several years and they never seemed to get in a hurry about anything.
"What's the big rush to do it today?" he asked.
Bubba explained, "Well, we heard in a news story last night that 1 out of every 10 children being born now in the United States is Mexican and we don't want to take a chance on having a Mexican baby."
"Why would you be worried about that?" the doctor asked. "Because neither one of us can speak Spanish.
- submitted by Firstmate -
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Two police officers, Leroy and Barny, call their precinct on the two-way radio.
"Hello. Is this the Sarge?"
"Yes it is."
"We have a domestic case here. A woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"No sir. "
"Why not?"
"The floor is still wet."